It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
