Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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