dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
