So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
