3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
So squirting runs in the family.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
