Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
