Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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