seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
