the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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