How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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