i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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