well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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