thus making me awesome and them whores
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
