Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i wish my penis had a tongue
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
