Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Randomize
