im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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