Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
