In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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