"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. π
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donβt have to recycle anymore ππ
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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