She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
