U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
