I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
