Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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