Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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