So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize