awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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