can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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