Capitaan dildo arrescate!
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
