i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
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