I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
