just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
please don't ironically join a cult
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