I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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