I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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