Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
