My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Of course I have a pirate flag
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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