I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You took a bar mat shot.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
