saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
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