we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
