is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
