I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
