It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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