Nicole vs. Life
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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