I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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