i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Randomize