We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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