"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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