Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
this is an emotional support booty call
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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