next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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