I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
