I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
