I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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