I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
jump out the window naked night went bad
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