I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
